funny quotes about myself

Christendom has done away with Christianity without being quite aware of it. ~Soren Kierkegaard, Time, 16 December 1946



Misquotation: an accidental or intentional misrepresentation of a person's speech or writing; this usually involves omission of important context, omission of important parts of the quote, insertion of allegedly implied words or partial sentences, incorrect rephrasing, misattribution, or misspelling; misquotation can be due to imperfect reproduction, misunderstanding, malice, deliberate deceit, humor, or satire.



It is the common wonder of all men, how among so many millions of faces, there should be none alike. ~Thomas Browne, Religio Medici



We pass through this world but once. Few tragedies can be more extensive than the stunting of life, few injustices deeper than the denial of an opportunity to strive or even to hope, by a limit imposed from without, but falsely identified as lying within. ~Stephen Jay Gould, The Mismeasure of Man



I like to browse in occult bookshops if for no other reason than to refresh my commitment to science. ~Heinz Pagels, The Dreams of Reason



A daughter is a mother's gender partner, her closest ally in the family confederacy, an extension of her self. And mothers are their daughters' role model, their biological and emotional road map, the arbiter of all their relationships. ~Victoria Secunda



Love is a sweet tyranny, because the lover endureth his torments willingly. ~Proverb



Boy, when you're dead, they really fix you up. I hope to hell when I do die somebody has sense enough to just dump me in the river or something. Anything except sticking me in a goddam cemetery. People coming and putting a bunch of flowers on your stomach on Sunday, and all that crap. Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody. ~J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye, 1945



My karma ran over your dogma. ~Author Unknown



All religions must be tolerated... for... every man must get to heaven his own way. ~Frederick the Great



A teacher who is attempting to teach without inspiring the pupil with a desire to learn is hammering on cold iron. ~Horace Mann



A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money. ~W.C. Fields



Belief in karma ought to make the life pure, strong, serene, and glad. Only our own deeds can hinder us; only our own will can fetter us. Once let men recognize this truth, and the hour of their liberation has struck. Nature cannot enslave the soul that by wisdom has gained power and uses both in love. ~Annie Besant



You can awaken each day to obligations you never chose - or you can decide now to choose them. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com



I prefer to regard a dessert as I would imagine the perfect woman: subtle, a little bittersweet, not blowsy and extrovert. Delicately made up, not highly rouged. Holding back, not exposing everything and, of course, with a flavor that lasts. ~Graham Kerr



You know you're in love when you don't want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. ~Dr. Seuss



We aim above the mark, to hit the mark. Every act hath some falsehood of exaggeration in it. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson



I have never let my schooling interfere with my education. ~Mark Twain



Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country. ~Steven Wright



You don't have to suffer to be a poet. Adolescence is enough suffering for anyone. ~John Ciardi, Simmons Review, Fall 1962